Loneliness Is...

Knowing that when you have to go to the doctor, regardless of how sick, you’re going alone

Waking up at 2:36am in tears and not knowing why

Being excited about a project and having no one to bounce it off of

Getting your hand held but only when there’s a witness

Speaking the words and gettin yelled at

Having to remove yourself from social media because you keep getting confronted about tweets that have nothing to do with the person doing the confronting

Being wrapped up with someone’s entire body, realizing nobody has touched you like that in over 3 years and being over taken by a sadness so deep you cry about it for a week but can’t express it to anyone

Trying to bandage something with a gaze instead of solutions

Knowing your partner is actually, genuinely, too lazy even if a solution is right in their hat 

Waiting, waiting, waiting and being told to wait some more 

Be told someone wants your company and then getting yelled at when you speak 

Having the fight in your head while you type the blog post because you know it’s inevitable and you want to be prepared 

Asking someone to pick up their own stuff and watching them throw something on the ground right in front of you over and over again

Asking for help to maintain a life and getting yelled at or told yes and then being completely ignored anyway

Not being trusted

Being resented but not being allowed to act like it’s even real

Knowing that you might open your mouth and get your head bitten off or you might get yelled at for acting like you might get your head bitten off

Living in a house with someone who doesn’t think a household emergency is worth their time but totally worth yours

Someone playing carelessly with you assuming you’ll always be there

Your therapist suggesting you hold a grown man like a baby who you already take care of like he’s your child

Being in a relationship and being told you’re not worthy of touch for years until the touch just stops all together

Knowing that if you don’t take the time to clean and handle the medical for the pets, it won’t get done

Living in a house with someone who knows nothing about you

Watching the world burn and having someone tell you that they’re a drug addict and now you get to deal with that

Having someone make the joke, “She takes care of junkies” when they know full well that there are deep tears in your soul from said addicts and all you’ve ever tried to do was escape them

Having entire moments that deeply effect you and not having anyone care enough to ask you about them or how you made it through

Knowing that anytime someone says. “Hey” what they mean is “Stop whatever you’re doing, you need to listen to me right now or I’ll punish you.”

Watching yourself gain twitches and knee jerk reactions every time you drop something out of fear it’ll piss someone off

Having a grown person tell you that it’s your responsibility to remind them to...

Loneliness is having to call a partnership with no affection and no sex a relationship